I'm Awake

This is kind of a problem seeing as it's around 5 in the morning.

Really quickly:

I'm on Wattpad. You can find the widget in the sidebar. I'm slowly getting things edited and I have collected a follower, amazingly.

I went to the Goodwill and came back with clothes and shoes and books and it was a very good trip ^^ I found the third Harry Potter book, The Uglies, The Curious Incident of The Dog in the Night-time, and Daughter of Smoke and Bone. And pinstriped things. Lots and lots of pinstripes. So, yeah, good trip. (Although my brain decided to make me laugh in the dressing room by saying "I'll be right out - I just want to see how my girl-goods look in ruffles." My brain is odd.)

Camp NaNoWriMo starts soon (on the same day as my next semester). I have an idea I would dearly love to do - I even have a beta-reader for it - but I'm really just hoping that I have the time.

For right now though, this has been an 'I'm still alive' update. I will probably try to sleep here pretty soon since the coffee's starting to wear off a little. I'll check back in soon~

Knights and Dragons and War

Oh, my!

Anyway, it's the 30th which means Alice in Writerland will be in FantNo the day after tomorrow. We'll be staying for the whole month so be sure to swing by.

I've never written fantasy before and it's just... really freakin' fun, you know? It's one in the morning and I am cold and I have a stitch in my side from the way I'm sitting and I feel like I'm just the greatest thing on two legs right now.

(Even though one of the stories I'm planning this year has an ending planned that is going to warrant this image:

So, yeah.)

(And yes, it does say 'my house' and 'the nearest cliff'. It's that painful. I am sorry to any future readers.)

I don't want to give anything away about that plot (well, I do, but I kind of can't) so this is going to be a shorter 'ZOMG I figured it out and this year is going the be FULL OF FEELS!' update post.

Tomorrow should (should, mind) see a 'year in review' kind of post and then we'll be jumping into writing and life updates from the new year. W00t?

Stay safe on New Years, everyone. There a lot of idiots out this time of year and it pays to stay off the roads late at night if you can.

So... see you once more this year~

I'm noticing something...

Several things, really:

1) I do better if I'm either encouraged or obnoxiously discouraged. If I'm encouraged and have people around me who are into the same kinds of things that I am, I feed off of that. If I'm obnoxiously discouraged, I feel the need to prove that I can do whatever I want and essentially one-up whoever was annoying me.

2) I need an outline. Not a full outline because I just cannot work from one of those but some semblance of an outline would probably be useful.

3) This place just drains me.

and 4) Some days I have way too many opinions to be on the internet.

But.

My writing is better organised, everything in its own folder. I'm slowly going though everything I can organize and basically just getting it as done as I can.

Really, I need to stop and plan that trilogy of mine out. I have a basic idea of each book (and I mean very basic) but I need a better map than that. And, randomly, I wonder if doing fan stories again would help at all or if I'd just wind up feeling like I should be working on my original stuff? I'm thinking it could be either way. But if I did, at least I'd have a use for my website.

...

I stayed up all night. And I actually feel pretty good, all in all. Basically, I'm channelling my NaNo MMC.

I feel like I should have a page here that defines all the stupid/weird terms I use. Of course there's a limit to how many pages that top bar can fit so I'd wind up linking it in the sidebar or something and we all know that there isn't a lot of room over there anymore. (I probably should do something else with that, I'm still not entirely happy with it.)

*sigh*

It's just not a good month, you know? Like, 'I'm once again considering getting my tongue/lip/eyebrow pierced' bad.

It's around three in the afternoon now. I'm gonna try to make it until about five and then crash. That should get my schedule back a little closer to normal.

Next year is WriYe. That should help. I hope.

Bye for now, everyone. I'm gonna wrap this up before I ramble any more than I already did. I'll check in again (at least once) before the end of the year.

In which watching TV shows online is preferable to working.

Really.

I have not been able to focus on anything. All I want to do for the next day or so is curl up and watch TV. Just shut my brain off for a little while.

I've been working on a cover for someone. That's going pretty well but we're kind of at a standstill because there's just not a lot more I can do without more information.

So there's that.

I think I just need a break.

- Finish the cover
- Edit/Combine with 'second draft' (The Book is getting there. Slowly.)
- Set up your 'Hire Me' page again. (I offer editing services)
- Get your list for 2013 finalised
- Set up your project blogs
- Get some semblance of an outline (one that actually works for you) for January.
- Do everything else you're forgetting about right now

Yeah.

I have a lot that I'd like to get done. And no motivation to actually do it. Well, that's not true. It's more like there's a kind of mental block or something. It's not just writer's block either - it's everything.

*sigh*

Screw this - I am now a pony:

I am purple. My name is (apparently) Flare and I am purple. I love me.

(Also, I kinda wanna do this to my hair. It looks awesome.)

For right now, I'm going to curl up and watch shows. Tomorrow (or maybe the day after) I'll jump back on writing, editing and general creativity. For right now, though, I just need to relax.

I hope you all have a nice, relaxing weekend and I will see you maybe on Monday? When I don't feel the need to be a pony anymore?

Yeah. Maybe Monday.

Bye for now, everyone. Have an awesome weekend.

Twenty-Eight: *tears hir hair out*

Let me tell you about things that annoy me.

- Improper use of semicolons
- Missing periods
- Extra space
- Atrocious formatting
- Inconsistent atrocious formatting
- Not starting your first chapter on the correct page
- Using your usernames as your author names on the cover
- Not spacing your chapters correctly.
- Back and front pages are nowhere near industry standards
- Too many '-ly' words
- You gave him a name - f'ing call him by it!
- No. Show me.
- These are separate ideas - why are they in the same sentence?
- OMG with the commas!
- Really? You screwed up the apostrophe?

And that was episode one of Jezzy's Editing Exploits. And, honestly, I'm very glad to have these things on hardcopy because wow. I mean, the story is fine all in all it's just that the writing... yeah.

I'm hoping that they don't get ticked off just because I found a lot of stuff. Even if they do, I've gotten a lot of experience from the books.

(It's not like I hadn't read them before, it's just that I wasn't really writing things down and then I couldn't find my notes so I'm basically having to do it all again. And I'm finding a lot more this time. So, yeah. Ow. I just really hope this is appreciated and not seen as 'Well, we don't wanna work with you anymore because you're just being a bitch'. No, I'm not - I'm being a good editor. Which you clearly need.)

Anyway.

I'm getting worked up over something that hasn't happened and might not happen. So. That was my day, mostly. That and marketing ideas for things that aren't mine. And some things that are.

...

I'm basically planning on being JtHM when I'm older (Jezzy the Happy Mortician). Cannot stop laughing over how well that works out.

So... yeah.

As you can probably tell, I am very tired and I've only edited 32 pages today.

All in all, a productive and tiring day that has left me with a lot of work that I will be happy to fall asleep and ignore for a few hours.

Bye for now, guys. Sorry for the quick, slightly ranting update but, hey, NaNoWriMo starts soon!

Entry the Seventh: Now I have to memorise a math book.

Also, I think I screwed up on the entry numbers and actually posting once a day. Don't care. Really don't care right now. Might care later but not now.

But my room is picked up. I can see the floor now and everything.

Also, earlier, I managed to do a three digit division and addition problem in my head... and I got the answer right. So, you know, what the hell? I... don't do math. Except apparently I do.

I also realised that I haven't been driving. Like at all. That's kind of a problem since I'll need my license before we leave (even though we have about five more months here...). Thing is, my grandpa makes me nervous. He was a test driver at Ford for a while, so he knows his stuff and that makes me think I'm doing everything wrong. Always. I know that's not the case - he's never anything but nice to me but still...

Oh, well. Just another thing, huh? Like that paper I keep forgetting to chip away at until I'm already very tired. *headdesk*

But. For right now:

Today, I have a treat (or an annoyance, depending on your point of view) for you all. I'm doing a room/bookshelf/DVD shelf tour... thing. But. I want you guys to do it too. I'd love to just pass this thing around and get to know people through their room/bookshelf/DVDs... or all three, like I've done. Because apparently, I'm an attention whore. And I'm all right with that.

So:

This is a part of my room. Note the awesome curtains. And the guitar case under the bed. See that desk thing with the lamp on it? The front part of that swings open. That's where a lot of my yarn and fabric are. Those are math books on the top.

This is another part of my room:

There are two sewing machines in this picture. And one dragon skull. (Am I cool yet? If the answer is no, please note the dragon cane leaning up against the dresser like a BOSS. Or the fake fox tail on the closet door. Also the computer bag. Because computer bag.)

The Singer 'Red Eye' on top

which might be a little blurry. Sorry, guys, it's been a long day.

And the Nelco in the cabinet it's sitting on. (Fun fact: My dad refinished that cabinet. And repaired both sewing machines. The Singer had been through a fire but it runs great now. The grey-ish box on it are the cams for the Nelco. The pedal is in the bag.)

Beside that is the trunk I was talking about before (with Yorick and Anubis on it).

Yorick is, of course, the dragon skull. Because I'm a geek. Anubis is just chillin' in the background there. By the fake roses. (Shut up. I like fake flowers and it's my room.) Is that plate with the candle on it upside down? I'm not sure anymore. Also the little dragon hourglass. And the candy dish. And the two small baskets, one of which is largely covered by my knock-off Wild Tiger hat. (I call it a Wild Tiger hat... it's striped.) And the rock candy in the bag in the first one and wow, I managed to cram a lot of stuff onto this trunk. 0.o

This is duct tape. Miles and miles of duct tape. I use it to make things. Things that I then use or try to sell, often unsuccessfully. There is also an awesome hat. You are jealous of the awesome hat.

In front of that is:

Both consoles. And a Polaroid 360 Land Camera. Yeah. There's also the matter of the 40-inch nightlight and the electric fireplace. And the gazing ball. You can kind of see them in the first picture. That's the edge of my DVD player on the left.

Also the bookshelf and DVD thing by the door. You know, a person's bookshelf can say a lot about them.

I am so cool. Look at all these books. Look at them! We're going to look at them very closely.

Shelf One


Empty Book, Life Sentences, A Deadly Game, The Dead Sea Scrolls, Milestone 2011, Calcaria, Abyss, Erased from Memory, Lonestar Sanctuary, together, The Wind in the Willows, The Grapes of Wrath, One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest, The Catcher in the Rye, Guilty Pleasures, What Time Devours, fan mail, The Client, The Devil Colony, So Close the Hand of Death, The Thief Lord, The Last Olympian, Humour Horror and The Supernatural, Politically Correct Fairy Tales, Johnathan Livingston Seagull, Working with Auras, Teachings Around the Scared Wheel, and three anxiety/self-injury workbooks.

Shelf Two

Sun Tsu's 'The Art of War', The Complete Tales and Poems of Edgar Allen Poe, Transgressions (this one has ten novellas in it), The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, The Girl Who Played With Fire, The Girl Who Kicked The Hornet's Nest, ES (Stephen King's 'IT' in German), Slaughterhouse Five, Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children, Looking for Alaska, An Abundance of Kathrines, Paper Towns, The Fault in Our Stars, The Name of the Star, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone, Empty Book, The Carrie Diaries, Lipstick Jungle, One Fifth Avenue, Several Gossip Girl Books

Shelf Three


Two Vegetarian Cookbooks, Fasting Girls: A History of Anorexia Nervosa, A Soldier's Best Friend, The Letter Q, In Search of Schrodinger's Cat, The Diary of Anne Frank, A Concise Biography of Adolf Hitler, The Sociopath Next Door, Inside a Cutter's Mind, Sorry I Thought I Loved You, Cut, Perfect, A Clockwork Orange, Rose Madder, The Smithsonian Institution, The Showa Anthology, A Darker Justice, The Killer Stain, Death Note: Another Note, Three Blank Notebooks, The Extraordinary Origins of Everyday Things, Pathways in Philosophy, Let's Learn Japanese, Criminal Law, Empty Book, The Bible, Empty Notebook

Shelf Four

Two Devil May Cry Novels, Five Trinity Blood Novels, Until the Full Moon (2 Volumes), FAKE (7 Volumes), D.N.Angel (11 Volumes), Godchild (8 Volumes), Trinity Blood (4 Volumes), JTHM Directors Cut, Batman and Psychology, Zen Speaks, Confucius Speaks, Empty Journal

Shelf Five

Understanding Nutrition, Abnormal Psychology, The Medical and Health Encyclopedia, Criminal Psychology, Forensic Psychology, British Poetry and Prose, Literature Textbook, The Comidies of Shakespeare, The Wit in the Dungeon, Berlin Diary, Matter Life and Energy, Essential Guitar Chords, Blank Photo Album, The Nazis and the Occult, The Compact Edition of the Oxford English Dictionary (2 Volumes)

And, of course, to make this even longer:

My DVDs... and games.

Top

The four against the bookshelf are about war planes (first two) and aliens (last two). The two holding those up are The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King and The Matrix: Reloaded. The CDs are a few anime soundtracks (Sailor Moon, Bubblegum Crisis 2040, and FLCL), one Gary Numan CD (Cars), one called 'lo-fi vs. sci-fi', and two Deth Albums. The remaining DVDs are Dark Shadows, Volumes One and Two of the Devil May Cry anime, Howl's Moving Castle, and Thor.

First Shelf

Assassin's Creed, Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood, Dead Space, Dead Space 2, Devil May Cry (1-3), Deus Ex: Human Revolution, Heavy Rain, Dead Space: Downfall, Repo! The Genetic Opera, Mirrors, 1408, Dead Silence, The Silence of the Lambs, A Scanner Darkly, The Strangers, The Breed, Sweeny Todd, Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust

Second Shelf

Edward Scissorhands, SAW Trilogy, SAW Four, SAW Five, Knock Knock, Der Untergang, Death Note, Death Note 2, Death Note: L Change the World, Black Butler (Kuroshitsuji), Copycat, Red Garden, FAKE, Descendants of Darkness

Third Shelf

The Vampire's Assistant, Trinity Blood Full Series, Neon Genesis Evangelion: Death and Rebirth and End of Evangelion, Sci-Fi Collector's Set, Horror Cinema, Horror Collector's Set, Autopsy, Horrorfest, (Are you sensing a theme yet?) D.N.Angel, The Original Japanese Version of 'Pokemon The Movie 2000', My Neighbor Totoro, CATS

Bottom Shelf

Invader Zim Box Set, The X Files Movie, Futurama: Bender's Game, Futurama: Into the Wild Green Yonder, 6 Seasons of ATHF, Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film For Theaters, 2 Seasons of Metalocolypse, and 2 Seasons of American Dad!

So...

That's that. I wonder if anyone's opinion of me has changed just because they now know some of what I own?

Well, I pass this along to... anyone who wants to do it, I guess. I always like doing hauls and tours like this but I never think there will be enough interest. And then I thought 'Wait. It's my blog. I can do what I want.'

So I did.

And I hope that you all appriciate this because it's after midnight here (officially making it the seventh) and it has been a long day.

So bye for now, everyone. Have a wonderful day with your new knowledge and I will see you all soon.

This City

which is our lifeblood could be brought to its knees by a single thought - why do we dream? - Galiger Tibalt.

It doesn't quite fit as Sioux Falls is far from Tokyo in terms of cyberpunk technology but it's a cool quote. Tibalt is asking, or rather pointing out, that we do not often stop to question our own lives and their relation to the world around us. More often than not we lock ourselves into a classic model for success - work, money, family - and never stop to question our motivations or to wonder why we dream. This quote seems to say that if we did, we might lose our current society but the unspoken continuation is that we may gain something much more valuable for taking the risk.

It's kind of an amazingly simple and deep quote... considering I just made it up. I make up quotes a lot. Anyway.

I ate blueberries the other day. That's not really a big deal except it kind of is because up until then I wouldn't eat them if I were starving. They were in this salad with sweetened spinach leaves, sliced strawberries and candied walnuts. It came with this little cup of tomato basil soup and I almost made myself sick on it.

Also, you know what they have here? World Market. If you don't know what that is, look into it. It is an amazing store. It has things from everywhere - Japan, Germany, Korea, Norway - and I just love it to death.

Let me take you through what happened here, 'cause it's kind of a long story:

We got into town and had planned to stay in an extended-stay hotel for the week. That kind of fell through since the place was basically a glorified Motel 6. So we stayed at the Ramkota Hotel which has an indoor pool with a water-slide, a restaurant and a little sports bar in the hotel. Also, the rooms look like this:

So that's kind of awesome. We then spent several days looking around the place. It's nice, actually. I mean, I rather like it but then mum and I figured out a better way to handle the whole college thing which effectively made this whole trip a long vacation. Which is fine by me.

Time for obligatory pictures of Falls Park:

And this one:

And then across the park (it's a big place):

There's also this creepy-looking thing near the actual falls:

Which leads me to bite my tongue to avoid making a 'The Key and The Gate' reference. I mean, seriously, look at this thing:

It's kind of a shame they had it closed off.

So then, after talking things over quite a bit, we decided I could go to Grey's Harbor Community College (which has a study abroad program, amazingly) and then go on to Evergreen State, we went to the bookstore. Prepare for book spam:

I got The Catcher in the Rye:

Slaughterhouse Five:

A Clockwork Orange:

The Sociopath Next Door:

Batman and Psychology (my geek is showing):

This awesome Edgar Allen Poe book:

And, of course, The Art of War:

So that was about 100 dollars and an awesome trip. From there, we went out for lunch since my stomach was about to eat itself. Chili's is actually good about substitutions so I could get a veggie quesadilla. Yay~!

The next little while was spent wandering around World Market. As a result, I have even more picture spam for you:

'Kimmy' Seasoned Seaweed (Korea):

Curiosity Cola:

Ramune Drink (Japan):

'Hello Kitty' Lucky Stars Candy (China):

'Chimes' Ginger Chews (Indonesia):

Blood Orange Soda (Italy):

And Dolfin Dark Chocolate with Pink Peppercorns (Belgium):

So yeah. I have way too many pictures and are you jealous yet? You have to be jealous. I would be. *squees*

Anyway, that was my picture-heavy post for the past few days. I'll be heading back soon and getting things straightened out there. But first I'll be in Montana for about two weeks. I feel like a touring author ^^

So... sorry (or not) for the picture spam this time but I'm all happy and excited because I won't be as bored anymore. I feel like Sherlock sometimes - 'Bored.'

Bye for now guys. I'm rambling and taking up a lot of space here so I'll check in once we figure out what exactly we'll be doing next.

(Long blog post was long.)

Wow

This has actually not happened before.

I ship my main characters. Well, that's happened before - but I ship these two like whoa. Like, I'm crying a little because I just have a lot of feelings about them. I have music that makes me think of them, some of which is playing right now and ow, my little writer heart. *gross sobbing*

This is insane. It's nice, but it's insane.

That was really the only news right now. I'm just kind of... shocked, I guess. Haven't felt like this about characters in quite a while. Hopefully that means I'm doing better with characters in general.

Huh.

*toddles back to book*

Things

And things.

It's late and I figured I could bore you all with a rallying post. Well, not so much rallying as 'This is what I need to be doing; hold me to it.'

First, basic schedule:

- Up at 8. Being up at 8 gives me an hour to screw around and still get three hours of work in before noon.

- Work for 3-4 hours. If I can't get something done in three to four hours, I'm doing it wrong.

- Take a break. Check twitter, tumblr, whatever. Eat, stretch, jump around, etc. for maybe a half hour.

- Work again until dinner (5 P.M.)

- Dinner break!

- Digest and then take a walk.

- You're free! Go do something you enjoy/sit around and do nothing.

Even that would be better than what I've got going on now. And that would give me time to get something that should have been done months ago done (finally!) and keeping that schedule will let me work on my website and on a few guidebook things I've been wanting to do. In short, it'll help me get things done. Which I really need to do.

Aside from that, I have a list (actually, a couple of them) that has the key points on it. Things I need to figure out for the website, things I need to make sure I get done before a certain time, etc.

Also, I'm between a couple of stories for a submission call a couple of months from now. Probably have to talk that over with mum and try to figure out which one fits the best. One would have to have more work done on it though. Ack. Why must almost everything I write fit at least some of these categories? *headdesk*

Actually, I think I know which one I want to do but I need to really nail down the plot for it and know where I'm going since it would have a deadline then. I like it though... Even though the doctor character needs a name and I'm not sure of the plot. It's kind of a zombie story... with mutated insects and fun things like that.

Anyway...

This was a simple update-y thing and I hope that I can stick to it because it actually sounds kind of fun. And, no, I don't know why that sounds fun, it just does.

I will check in later, guys. Hopefully with good news ^^

Twenty-Four Days Before

Yesterday was awesome because the anthology I was waiting on came out for pre-order. (I'm thinking the paperback and the perfume from the shop once I get things set up. Once I get moved. Again.)

Today is awesome just because I have internet.

Actually, I'm sponging off of my neighbour's signal (with their permission) because some genius cut our internet line. Though, in their defense, it was across their driveway. So...

Yeah. I'm going to go back to working on my guide thing (which might be up for sale here fairly soon if I can get a handle on my thoughts). This was really kind of just an update because I'm glad to be able to update again.

Course not having the internet did help me get way more done... even if I couldn't reply to people and it took me way too long to go through my tumblr dash. And now I have a clueless nerd asking me questions in my head and holy schizophrenia, Batman I am glad I can use 'I'm a writer' as an excuse for my weirdness.

*toddles off to work*

Thirty-Two Days Before

It's 11:30 in the morning and I'm sitting at the kitchen table between my Mum and my Grandma. Grandpa's in the living room eating soup off of a plate because he's too stubborn to get a bowl.

And it's cozy.

I'm not sure why but it's cozy.

So... I'm sitting around thinking up creative ways to kill people and wondering if you just have to go through the muscle wall to get to the intestines and also how tightly wound they are inside. It's for a book, I swear. I need to be working but it's just not there right now, you know?

I'm hoping I can get around two outlines at least most of the way done before the month is out. They'll probably be crap but at least I'll have something to work with.

In other news, I'm kicking around the idea of websites. Not sure exactly what I'm doing yet but the idea is there and that's something. (I'm thinking about putting chapters/snippets up with a link to where you can buy it at the end of the preview. Of course, this assumes that I have something to sell, which currently I don't. That's in the process of getting fixed, though.)

I'm starting to wonder about this being the month for me to step out of  my writing comfort zone. I liked my comfort zone. It was... not so bloody. But it's one of those 'growing as a writer' things. No matter what I wind up doing for a living, I think I'd rather it be around books.



I'm going to go back to writing... hopefully on something productive and I will see you guys later.

(Post Scriptum - Is the countdown in the post titles making anyone nervous yet?)

Research and Rambling

Seriously.

I'm getting that weird kind of pressure on my chest and I just want to talk in circles about nothing that actually means anything. So, yeah, I'm pretty normal ^^;

I'm also researching hacking. Which makes me nervous. But anyway...

Any time I find myself writing anything similar to 'This really all goes back to my concept of the Ouroborean Rings – a representation of smaller infinities within a larger infinity, comprising the whole, interconnected but separate' I'm either really on track, or rambling horribly. In fact, it's probably a mixture of both.

I really don't know what I'm on about right now. Guess I'm kind of lonely and just wanting to talk at someone for a while.

I mean, lately I've been thinking in broader terms. By broader terms I mean that I've been trying to place my characters and stories in a broader social context. I realise that most writers have this moment where the process of consistently thinking about characters as they exist outside the pages has been started and everything is new and interesting because you're finally doing it right. Well, that seems to have happened to me. Awesome for me and for a potential future career but annoying for those around me, more than likely.

I don't know what I'm saying, really. I probably just need to read or write for a while and get my mind in a different place. My interest in languages is flaring up again. As is my interest in creepy/romantic things like saying 'I wonder what you taste like'.

[It's 1:24 right now. This entry is probably going to take me all night.]

Just spent almost half an hour listening to P!ATD. And I'm almost half-way through Looking for Alaska... I'm kind of loving it and sitting around seething in anger at the seeming ease with which John Green can write. And then that little part of my mind says 'I can do that' and then I try to. And I fancy I get just a bit closer.

So that's where I am.

Sitting around at 2 in the morning, thinking 'I think I just have too much filler between the interesting scenes' and considering how I should go about fixing that.

I'm also waiting for pre-order information and pricing on a book I kind of want very badly. The authors are people I found through tumblr and I just... yes, the story is rather sexual (as in there's kind of a lot in it) but it serves a psychological point in showing just how broken one of the main characters is (And it really is one of those stories that makes you contemplate all possible meanings of the phrase 'broken toy'.) and the plot and the emotions and the fact that I curled up and cried one night over one of the characters when I just thought about him for too long is pretty solid. So I'm hoping I can scrounge up the money/that it's not too much. Because from what I know of the writers, they are amazing women.

So...

I'm probably going to go watch something on YouTube for a while and then go read until my eyes start to cross. And maybe scavenge for food. And then finally do something productive. Hopefully.

See ya~!

[*sets down her script* That was awful. That was all awful. I mean the writing thing was good, the philosophy thing was good, the book thing at the end was good but everything else... I just... I don't know. *sigh* This really could have been half the length it is. I need to learn to edit... and I really need a snack.]

On All Kinds of Things

First off, writing:

Been thinking about that lately. Mainly because a certain editor was impressed by how much I'd improved quality-wise. Like, insanely (and, I think, unduly) impressed. Story-wise is another matter and now I kind of just want to kick ass as an independent since I really doubt I could be marketable overall as mainstream and still have any fun with the story, you know? Doesn't really matter why, just need to own it, right? Right.

Second, music:

Slowly falling for Panic! At The Disco. Yeah. And screwing around with novel soundtracks because I can.

Third, my project-hopping:

I project-hop. A lot. It's gotten so bad that in the last few hours I've researched all kinds of guns, written part of a very emotional scene, written lines for other places in that same story, gotten annoyed (yet again) with The Book, struggled with how to handle a short story and realised that I am definitively 'not mainstream'.

BUT.

I am cognizant of that fact. My project hopping seems to have its advantages. I can get away from stories I'm starting to hate and work on something that actually flows for at least a few minutes.

...

I just realised how little point most of these entries have anymore...

I also realised that I ramble too much, compartmentalise too much and generally 'talk to fill the silence' too much in my actual books. That, my friends, is why I'm having such a fit. And thankfully that is a relatively simple fix.

So... I'm going to try to have more of a point in the future... and I'm going to go work on something for a little while - just see what I can't do when I'm paying attention.

Official Diagnosis

Vexin Hypergraphia exacerbated by severe MSD (Multiple Story Disorder) with accompanying Sequel Syndrome. Shows signs of AADD (Author Attention Deficit Disorder). Currently on low-dose Jarador to control vocal outbursts and nervous ticking of the hands.

(This is what my brain does. Send help.)

Anyway. Time for random information about characters you currently don't care about.

I think I figured out why I love Carmen so much: He's a gorgeous, anti-social, bisexual, gender-variant assassin hacker. (Understand that there is no part of this sentence that I don't like.) Of course that 'ethical hacker' side of him results in me having to research hacking (which I still believe should just be called 'hacking' across the board) and that's making me nervous because he can at times cross over into 'hacktivist' territory.

In other news, I'm sitting here with a headache and a new piece of the plot for a new book. It makes my heart hurt and makes me want to cry to think about it so it's probably worth writing in.

Suffice it to say it contains a scene where the older-by-probably-at-least-four-years protagonist gets to look back at his best friend and, nearly crying, ask 'You were born after me... so why did you have to grow up before I did?'

(Knowing the context for the above, I am somewhat of a mess just from that.)

Anyway... I'm using that as a transition too much and I should probably try to do something that doesn't make me want to curl up in a dark room and cry for a while.

See ya~

Well

I think the phrase of the day is: "This is your world, not mine. I will help you from mine."

At least I want to.

This apparently means 'Time to recruit people as beta readers and then actually finish that thing you were working on so that you actually need said beta reader'.

I have one short story to go to her and I'd sort of like an outsider's opinion on the first chapter of the novel. Not sure on that, though. I'm kind of paranoid of it. I mean, I realise that 'books are not babies' and all of that but... it is. I mean a first book is an ordeal and this one has changed so, so much since the first draft. I'm starting to believe the whole 'books are made in revision' thing.

So, since it's after five in the morning, I had a nightmare, I'm tired but I don't want to sleep and am hence currently rambling and unintelligent as if my life depended upon those two qualities, I'm going to go try to do something constructive.

I also broke a nail and so now one is really short and it's just weird. I'm hungry and sad and it's just not a fun moment...

I think I would want to work in a library. Like, once I get settled where I'm going to live and all that. Just find a library and work there.

(You can really tell I'm sleep deprived.)

I can haz internet~!

After two days. Two days of no internet, no TV and no fridge.

But. Everything's okay now. Because my time-wasters are firmly back in place. But where to start...

Okay. So I just spent four days on the road and then another... three(?) unpacking my life from its cardboard containers. That's still nowhere near done, by the way. I have a lot of life, apparently.

But we're here, we're basically settled, we have a fridge - I think we're doing okay.

I was followed around and called pretty by one of the movers, including phrases like 'She's so tiny! She's tiny now!' (I have lost weight and I'm really freaking short but still.) This was tempered slightly by the fact that I was in town shopping with my mum and Grandma for most of the time they were there. Most of the remaining time was spent putting night stands together (bruising my hands in the process) and trying to keep said mover from happening to anyone.

That was all very odd. And it didn't help that beforehand the door on the big moving truck was jammed (by a table, I think) so all four of us had to go out and help open it. This resulted in my taking skin off of my knuckles when a suitcase decided it would be funny to slide down the door and trap my fingers.

The night before all of this was spent in a motel in town, eating what I could from McDonald's because it was closest and we were all tired. So we sat in the adjoining room with my grandparents and talked about things. Mainly writing things. I think my grandpa was surprised by how dark my writing was. But on the upside he seemed to be listening to me ramble. Yay~

We also learned the valuable lesson: Don't waste good pizza on trashy women. There's a story in there. But I'm not going to tell it.

Also, backwards chronology is backwards but I don't actually care.

So, Yay, update~! Now I'm going to go back to writing about slightly whorish, gender non-conforming assassins. Awesome.

JulNoWriMo Part 2 - Jezzy Sucks at Camp NaNoWriMo

The official three coolest words in the English language right now for me are: Hip Hop Violin. If anyone reads this after 'Faust in Chains' is already out (that would be so awesome) and wondered what Nick's audition for Mellie might have sounded like here you go. As long as the video stays up, that is. If it's not there it's Josh Vietti 'cause he rocks.

That video is proof that YouTube can be a very valuable resource for writers in need. (The More You Know)

Also, I suck at Camp NaNoWriMo. My JulNo is a little ahead of schedule. My Camp WriMo is way behind. But it's not a problem. I'll catch up. After all... I am the pretty WriMo soldier Jezaret Addison, the soldier of love and creativity! And in the name of Sirius, the dog star, I'll win! (Author's note: She's been watching Sailor Moon again. Just go ahead and ignore this.)

There are fireworks going off every five second right outside my window meaning I have to keep stopping because it breaks my concentration. Thanks guys. Really. >.>

On top of all that, my roommates have the TV on in the living room loud enough that I can hear it in my room. I normally don't mind but right now it's really on my nerves. I'm on YouTube blasting 'Hell Frozen Rain' from Silent Hill to drown them out.

Also, as I'm writing this, the JulNo site is down and that makes me sad. Also my hands are freezing and that also makes me sad. A lot of things are making me sad right now, like my apparent inability to spell correctly. (Thank you, spell-check. ILU) So. I'm off to try and catch up on my other project and hopefully the friction from typing will keep the frostbite from destroying my fingers. Bai-bai.

The UIE/PWMWG Accord and Also Billy Franks

First off some news from Ink-Slingaria:

An accord between the Union of Internal Editors (UIE) and the Pro-WriMo Writers Group (PWMWG) has officially been reached at the 2011 International Year of Writing a Damn Lot Conference held earlier this year.

As the write-up in the Ink-Slingaria Post-Intelligencer put it:

Mark Stanly from the UIE made a convincing argument at the opening of the conference but was ultimately talked down by the Pro-WriMo representatives on the grounds that time was much more a factor than plot in times of WriMos and that structure and pacing could always be fixed at a later date. The ultimate blow to the argument came when Miss Tina Sullivan of Wisconsin brought it to the attention of the committee that editing often decreases word count, being the opposite of the overall WriMo philosophy and in particular the International Year of Writing a Damn Lot itself.

After several smaller debates spanning the next few hours an agreement was finally reached: criticising the first draft of your work is no longer permitted by the official IYoWaDL councils.

So it's official.

Adding to my excitement is this: Billy Franks is about to have a book published. If you don't know him, go here. It explains everything a lot better than I can. His book ('A Far Cry from Sunset') goes through the experience of making the film 'Tribute This!' as well as some stories from his musical career. I think this thing is definitely on my reading list ^^