It's not even one thing. It's like, everything.
At least my utter lack of motivation has led me to get something done, even if it wasn't exactly productive in the traditional sense. (What that means is that I got something done in terms of setting up project blogs.)
Anyway.
Things are going along, slowly and that's about all I can ask for right now. Working on a short little thing for no reason at all. I have so many ideas I just need to get it through my head that nothing is really stopping me from getting them done, right? Right.
Okay. Short post this time. Need to actually go work on something.
Bye, guys~
25.8.12
I Dislike The Alentra
The Alentra - a car used at a driving school I am currently attending. It is touchy on the gas pedal and there seems to be some lag in the wheel. But anyway....
I am infinitely more comfortable behind the wheel of my mother's car - a little Ford Escape. So that's something. I can see better and the gas and brake feel smoother and all that.
Also, sometimes my instructor kind of sucks at being encouraging.
But since that was really the whole point of that post, I feel the need to continue rambling.
So...
1) I have too many project blogs. Well, that's not true, I just have too many project blogs for projects I'm not working on.
2) I have a website that is (unpublished and) rotting away and needs love. All I need to do is get the first maybe three chapters of each thing up. That shouldn't be too hard. I only have... about 115 ideas. Yeah.
3) I have so many new things - interests and bands and just... things. I've written playlists for all kinds of projects and I've spent time wishing I had like an artist's loft where I could throw down tarps and paint and I want to go do something active - like dance or just run for a while.
4) I just need to freaking write, okay?
And 5) I start school on the 17th. I'm not really taking that much but it's still a new experience. And I want to do things like theatre and crap like that. Why? *shrug* Why not? I also have a list of books and games I want so I'll have to find a way to get those. And now I'm rambling. Yay?
But yeah. Things are looking up, I guess. I get the feeling that if I could just get going, I'd be unstoppable. And that would be awesome.
Bye for now, guys. I should really do something productive since I'm still awake.
See ya~
I am infinitely more comfortable behind the wheel of my mother's car - a little Ford Escape. So that's something. I can see better and the gas and brake feel smoother and all that.
Also, sometimes my instructor kind of sucks at being encouraging.
But since that was really the whole point of that post, I feel the need to continue rambling.
So...
1) I have too many project blogs. Well, that's not true, I just have too many project blogs for projects I'm not working on.
2) I have a website that is (unpublished and) rotting away and needs love. All I need to do is get the first maybe three chapters of each thing up. That shouldn't be too hard. I only have... about 115 ideas. Yeah.
3) I have so many new things - interests and bands and just... things. I've written playlists for all kinds of projects and I've spent time wishing I had like an artist's loft where I could throw down tarps and paint and I want to go do something active - like dance or just run for a while.
4) I just need to freaking write, okay?
And 5) I start school on the 17th. I'm not really taking that much but it's still a new experience. And I want to do things like theatre and crap like that. Why? *shrug* Why not? I also have a list of books and games I want so I'll have to find a way to get those. And now I'm rambling. Yay?
But yeah. Things are looking up, I guess. I get the feeling that if I could just get going, I'd be unstoppable. And that would be awesome.
Bye for now, guys. I should really do something productive since I'm still awake.
See ya~
22.8.12
I'm Weird
I am. It's no one's 'fault' - I was just born this way...
Really, though, I am a little strange. I mean, honestly, how many nineteen-year-olds 1) spend any of their free time looking up Gilbert and Sullivan operettas or 2) just want to live in a decent-sized apartment, close to bookstores and coffee shops, where I can throw tarps down in the living room and paint?
That's really all I want. A quiet, calm life.
I want a place where I can write and paint and sew and just live for a while. I want to do interesting things for no reason at all.
I have so may ideas, they're just trampling all over each other in there. That drive to write is slowly coming back to me, I think.
So this is good. This is all good.
And I should probably sleep. I get to go driving tomorrow and I want to make my mum not be a ball of nervous energy about that.
I also drew a creepy doll. I've named her Jodie.
So, that's about where I am. I'm just... things are actually going. They're not just stuck in limbo anymore - which is great because my back was killing me - and I'm just along for the ride now. Cool.
Bye for now, guys. Don't do anything I wouldn't do.
(Also, this is my 160th post on here. ... I know, right? I talk a lot.)
Really, though, I am a little strange. I mean, honestly, how many nineteen-year-olds 1) spend any of their free time looking up Gilbert and Sullivan operettas or 2) just want to live in a decent-sized apartment, close to bookstores and coffee shops, where I can throw tarps down in the living room and paint?
That's really all I want. A quiet, calm life.
I want a place where I can write and paint and sew and just live for a while. I want to do interesting things for no reason at all.
I have so may ideas, they're just trampling all over each other in there. That drive to write is slowly coming back to me, I think.
So this is good. This is all good.
And I should probably sleep. I get to go driving tomorrow and I want to make my mum not be a ball of nervous energy about that.
I also drew a creepy doll. I've named her Jodie.
So, that's about where I am. I'm just... things are actually going. They're not just stuck in limbo anymore - which is great because my back was killing me - and I'm just along for the ride now. Cool.
Bye for now, guys. Don't do anything I wouldn't do.
(Also, this is my 160th post on here. ... I know, right? I talk a lot.)
17.8.12
How Am I Not Screwed?
Really.
Do you know what I did today? I drove. Willingly. Just around a failing mall's parking lot but still. My turns don't even suck as bad as I thought they might. I could even park in the lines.
Also, I applied for a job on campus.
So, knowing all of that, I ask you this:
What. The hell. Is wrong with me?
I'm serious. I'm markedly not freaking out about this. Like, at all. So what the hell?
I mean, I'm glad. But why? I changed so much in the last little while...
I have a new book. Well, two actually. One is my actual Math textbook. For class. For college. Wow. The other one is called 'The Letter Q' and it's full of queer writer's letters to their younger selves. So that's cool.
I've also developed a love of frozen Kit-Kats. Seriously, try it. It's amazing.
Aside from everything about my outlook changing seemingly overnight, not much has been happening. So, yeah.
I think I'm either going to stay up way too late watching a very strange show I'm not even sure why I like or else writing. Either way, it should be fun ^^
Bye for now, guys. You'll get an update when and if I hear something.
Do you know what I did today? I drove. Willingly. Just around a failing mall's parking lot but still. My turns don't even suck as bad as I thought they might. I could even park in the lines.
Also, I applied for a job on campus.
So, knowing all of that, I ask you this:
What. The hell. Is wrong with me?
I'm serious. I'm markedly not freaking out about this. Like, at all. So what the hell?
I mean, I'm glad. But why? I changed so much in the last little while...
I have a new book. Well, two actually. One is my actual Math textbook. For class. For college. Wow. The other one is called 'The Letter Q' and it's full of queer writer's letters to their younger selves. So that's cool.
I've also developed a love of frozen Kit-Kats. Seriously, try it. It's amazing.
Aside from everything about my outlook changing seemingly overnight, not much has been happening. So, yeah.
I think I'm either going to stay up way too late watching a very strange show I'm not even sure why I like or else writing. Either way, it should be fun ^^
Bye for now, guys. You'll get an update when and if I hear something.
11.8.12
Better Update
Section One: School
Section 1-A: Driving School
Yes, I get/have to go to driving school, starting on the thirteenth. I'll be surrounded by people younger than me. Oh, joy. The instructor should be all right though, so that's something. At least I don't have to actually drive until about the third lesson and I could get my learner's permit without taking the written because I was enrolled.
Section 1-B: College
College is bound to be interesting. I have a Freshman year course, a math class, an English class and a Psych 101 class. Awesome. Also, the school has this giant staircase that leads up from the parking lot. They call it 'Cardiac Lane'. Gee, I wonder why.
House
We have a house now. We can move in as soon as it closes, which should be around the time school starts, of course. Because everything happens at once in my world.
It's a nice house though. It's all one level but I don't hate that as much as I thought I might. And I'll have like an office/craft room, so that's cool.
Writing
I'm working on several things at the speed of continental drift right now. But today's been better at least. Things are slowly getting done. Slowly.
I'm thinking of just skipping the whole find an agent/publisher thing and just throwing things out under my own banner - my own company. If nothing else it would be a learning experience, right? Of course, this is all just me kicking around ideas.
Anyway...
I'll be back when I'm less overheated and more likely to spend more than about five minutes on a real post. *headdesk*
Section 1-A: Driving School
Yes, I get/have to go to driving school, starting on the thirteenth. I'll be surrounded by people younger than me. Oh, joy. The instructor should be all right though, so that's something. At least I don't have to actually drive until about the third lesson and I could get my learner's permit without taking the written because I was enrolled.
Section 1-B: College
College is bound to be interesting. I have a Freshman year course, a math class, an English class and a Psych 101 class. Awesome. Also, the school has this giant staircase that leads up from the parking lot. They call it 'Cardiac Lane'. Gee, I wonder why.
House
We have a house now. We can move in as soon as it closes, which should be around the time school starts, of course. Because everything happens at once in my world.
It's a nice house though. It's all one level but I don't hate that as much as I thought I might. And I'll have like an office/craft room, so that's cool.
Writing
I'm working on several things at the speed of continental drift right now. But today's been better at least. Things are slowly getting done. Slowly.
I'm thinking of just skipping the whole find an agent/publisher thing and just throwing things out under my own banner - my own company. If nothing else it would be a learning experience, right? Of course, this is all just me kicking around ideas.
Anyway...
I'll be back when I'm less overheated and more likely to spend more than about five minutes on a real post. *headdesk*
9.8.12
My Life
is insane.
Not really but I've been less stressed than I am currently, let's just say.
It's the ninth. I start school on the 17th of September. I'll be starting driving school on the 13th of this month, I think.
So yeah. Little stressful.
I also can't really get a handle on most of my thoughts lately and that's a little freaky.
So, I'm awake and listening to music. It's fun, actually, even though I should be writing. Or sleeping since it's about 2 in the morning. But sleeping's boring.
This is going to be a short update seeing as I really have nothing to say since the last several days have been kind of a blur. We have a house and a plan and I will fill you in later. I'm sorry, anyone who actually reads this thing. I know I'm a spazz *headdesk*
Not really but I've been less stressed than I am currently, let's just say.
It's the ninth. I start school on the 17th of September. I'll be starting driving school on the 13th of this month, I think.
So yeah. Little stressful.
I also can't really get a handle on most of my thoughts lately and that's a little freaky.
So, I'm awake and listening to music. It's fun, actually, even though I should be writing. Or sleeping since it's about 2 in the morning. But sleeping's boring.
This is going to be a short update seeing as I really have nothing to say since the last several days have been kind of a blur. We have a house and a plan and I will fill you in later. I'm sorry, anyone who actually reads this thing. I know I'm a spazz *headdesk*
6.8.12
Another Two A.M.
I'm still awake. I will probably sleep before the sun comes up because I have a school thing later but at this point I can't promise much.
It's so weird. I feel perfectly fine. It's just that I can't sleep. Even if I try, I keep thinking and it keeps me awake.
I can't even focus long enough to get anything done so I'm left kind of just sitting here... with way too many thoughts and ideas running around in my funny little brain.
It's mostly writing but some of it is other stuff. I can't really tell what, though, since everything's all jumbled up.
It's three. When did it get to be three? Ick.
It's so weird. I feel perfectly fine. It's just that I can't sleep. Even if I try, I keep thinking and it keeps me awake.
I can't even focus long enough to get anything done so I'm left kind of just sitting here... with way too many thoughts and ideas running around in my funny little brain.
It's mostly writing but some of it is other stuff. I can't really tell what, though, since everything's all jumbled up.
It's three. When did it get to be three? Ick.
3.8.12
Apparently
manually strangling someone will not bruise your hands. The neck is very soft and the most effective way is to just use your thumbs and the side of your hand to cut off the jugular vein and the windpipe. It doesn't take much.
...
It was another writer on Twitter. That's how I know that, I swear!
Anyway.
The place we were looking at fell apart on inspection (Really, who thinks it's a good idea to put layer after layer of shingles on a roof? When you do that, you get bends and dips in the sheeting/decking and then you have to tear the whole thing out and redo it. Unacceptable!) so we're going to go out looking again tomorrow. This is getting annoying but, hey, what can you do?
I think at least two people are going to die in this first chapter. I really do. One on each side, probably. On the upside, I did get to call Nicolai a 'Russian murder machine' (which he kind of is. Boy is seriously messed up).
I'm not sure exactly how screwed up this book is going to wind up being but I'm leaning toward 'very'.
Aside from that drama, I don't really have much of an update... I'll probably try to sleep on this little half-hatched idea of mine here pretty soon. I think I can run with it.
Night, guys! Hopefully, I'll have some house-related good news tomorrow.
...
It was another writer on Twitter. That's how I know that, I swear!
Anyway.
The place we were looking at fell apart on inspection (Really, who thinks it's a good idea to put layer after layer of shingles on a roof? When you do that, you get bends and dips in the sheeting/decking and then you have to tear the whole thing out and redo it. Unacceptable!) so we're going to go out looking again tomorrow. This is getting annoying but, hey, what can you do?
I think at least two people are going to die in this first chapter. I really do. One on each side, probably. On the upside, I did get to call Nicolai a 'Russian murder machine' (which he kind of is. Boy is seriously messed up).
I'm not sure exactly how screwed up this book is going to wind up being but I'm leaning toward 'very'.
Aside from that drama, I don't really have much of an update... I'll probably try to sleep on this little half-hatched idea of mine here pretty soon. I think I can run with it.
Night, guys! Hopefully, I'll have some house-related good news tomorrow.
2.8.12
Wow
Really, life? Really, self? Really?
'I want to write.'
'I want to read.'
'I want to go to school.'
'I want to drive.'
How?
It is after 1 in the morning and I'm up listening to pop-ish Romanian music. That should tell you everything you need to know about me.
Well, I'm also reading a webcomic and wanting to finish 'The Catcher in the Rye' so I can start reading the books that woman sent me for an editing job. (I kind of hate the formatting in the hard-copy but the writing itself isn't too bad, from what I've read.) That and all of the other books I have downstairs.
I'm jumping into AugNoWriMo again this year. I hope I can get a short story that I don't hate in the anthology this time. (I don't really despise the one from last year but... it wasn't my best.) I'm using the same main novel for both Camp NaNo and AugNo this year, so that should take some of the pressure off. I hope.
I have driving school this month. I'm not freaking out just yet but believe me, that's coming like a freight train.
And normal school starts on the 17th of September. (Normal school! Normal school! I get to go to normal school!) So, I'm a little freaked out. Just a little. Not too much. I have to go in on Monday(?) to talk to people and get things set up and all that happy crap. The placement test wasn't too awful, at least. I got a perfect score on the sentence structure part.
Now... I should probably be sleeping. We have to go to the home inspection tomorrow and I should probably be awake for that.
I'm starting to get slightly obsessed with JTHM again. That and Deus Ex: Human Revolution. So that's fun.
Bye for now, guys. I'm rambling and I should really get back to writing sometime soon. Just wanted to let you all know that I'm not dead ^^
'I want to write.'
'I want to read.'
'I want to go to school.'
'I want to drive.'
How?
It is after 1 in the morning and I'm up listening to pop-ish Romanian music. That should tell you everything you need to know about me.
Well, I'm also reading a webcomic and wanting to finish 'The Catcher in the Rye' so I can start reading the books that woman sent me for an editing job. (I kind of hate the formatting in the hard-copy but the writing itself isn't too bad, from what I've read.) That and all of the other books I have downstairs.
I'm jumping into AugNoWriMo again this year. I hope I can get a short story that I don't hate in the anthology this time. (I don't really despise the one from last year but... it wasn't my best.) I'm using the same main novel for both Camp NaNo and AugNo this year, so that should take some of the pressure off. I hope.
I have driving school this month. I'm not freaking out just yet but believe me, that's coming like a freight train.
And normal school starts on the 17th of September. (Normal school! Normal school! I get to go to normal school!) So, I'm a little freaked out. Just a little. Not too much. I have to go in on Monday(?) to talk to people and get things set up and all that happy crap. The placement test wasn't too awful, at least. I got a perfect score on the sentence structure part.
Now... I should probably be sleeping. We have to go to the home inspection tomorrow and I should probably be awake for that.
I'm starting to get slightly obsessed with JTHM again. That and Deus Ex: Human Revolution. So that's fun.
Bye for now, guys. I'm rambling and I should really get back to writing sometime soon. Just wanted to let you all know that I'm not dead ^^
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