I'm Living in a World of Goldfish

I figured it out.

I am legitimately very intelligent. As in, my testable IQ when I was in 5th grade was 115 and that was off of a test where I skipped several (and I do mean several) questions just because I was bored and didn't want to do them so the odds are that it's higher. By how much, I'm not sure, but higher.

Now, I'm not sure I believe that intelligence can be accurately quantified but I do know that a decent IQ test can give you a good baseline for how you're going to interact with the rest of the world.

Therefore, I submit to you this thought: What if I'm not a hack, or a loser, or even untalented? What if my ideas are capital-I Ideas? What if I can write brilliantly, paint beautifully, learn languages and instruments easily, 'think outside the box' and keep my grades high without really trying, understand complex topics with half the explanation time it would take the average student? What if I'm legitimately attractive or at least cute? What if I can build air scrubbers for use in deep space or improve the functionality of prosthetic limbs and develop functional augments that pick up the electrical impulses sent from the brain rather than relying solely on muscle contractions? What if I'm a little bit amazing?

Now... I figured out a day or so ago that I was just pretty lazy when it came to actually... well, doing anything, at this point. But I'm not sure that's the whole story, although it is a decent-sized chunk of it.

What I think might be happening is that I'm already aware of that gap between myself and the rest of 'normal', 'average' society. (Please note that there is nothing at all wrong with being average - it's just that when you're not, you really notice it.) The laziness may partially be coming from a desire to not alienate myself anymore than absolutely necessary. Intelligence is isolation in most circles.

This is an unfortunate realization for me because it proves that I do in fact care about the rest of society and that's something I was trying to avoid.

So there's your bite-sized epiphany for the day. I'm lazy about things because I'm already lonely (even though I don't want to be because I'm very aware that most people seem to be bastards. In fact, most of them appear to be bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling) and all I've been trying to do is not make the jump between worlds any wider than it already was. My inter-dimensional portal gun doesn't have the best battery life.

Maybe that's the first thing I should look into fixing.

Wubba Lubba Dub Dub

My twitter changed:

Also I have a tumblr theme I think is pretty cool:

Both of them say 'The Doctor is In(sane)', because I love the idea of psycho doctors so... yeah.

It's late and my focus is shit and I think I'm just going to sleep and actually make an effort to jump in tomorrow and get things done.

I'm having a lot of emotions about things and that is not conducive to actual work 95% of the time.

Four in the morning blog

Because life is fun like that sometimes.

I have a lot to do. Well, not really a lot but a lot for me since I'm not used to much, to be perfectly honest.

I have writing to do - seriously, I want to get this project done because it's fun and actually really good story-wise and I want to see it out there - and I have four classes to keep track of (because three of them are online) and one of these classes has an annoying amount of simple work to do (like journals and two forum posts on like three different boards each week for eleven weeks and... yeah).

Also I made this creepy thing:

It's a drawing of a rabbit skull. And crossed fountain pens. Because... reasons.

But yeah, this decided to crash my computer when I tried to do a  layering effect on it in GIMP so I decided to leave it as-is. I'm showing you this thing because, unlike my writing and school work, this is actually done.

And, a couple nights ago, I got super bored so I put on a mask and took pictures with my webcam.

This has kind of a YA book cover look to it. (I kept getting distracted by trying to look decent so I closed my eyes.)

"My, my... How terribly interesting, Lord Beckett."

And that was me hoping the cam would pick up some of the details. I was planning on using this as part of my rave costume for DashCon but sadly the rave was cancelled. *sad* I might still bring it though - wear it to DashProm or something - because, really, I should apparently always wear a mask.

But yeah, that's about all that's been going on lately. My one on-campus class is Film Interpretation, though and it's been really fun so far. I way-over-analyse things anyway so it's not really much of a stretch to think about a story like the teacher wants us to.

My math teacher is apparently Irish (if his faint accent in his lecture videos is anything to go by) and he's a little like a puppy in that he's all enthusiastic about students and stuff. I'm trying to find it charming.

It's kind of cool that we actually have book work for the class though, instead of it all just being online.

I have a scientific article to track down for Astronomy (and a journal to do, and a few posts to make) before Sunday, but it won't be too bad if I can just keep up.

So that's where I'm at right now. I think, since my brain is just slightly fried right now, I'm going to read for a little while and then try to sleep. I'll have to be up by at least 11 if I want to get anything done tomorrow and I do have a math section due by the end of the day so... yeah.

Goodnight for now, everyone~ I'll check in probably sometime next week, hopefully with good news about life in general.

Well, That Kind of Made My Night

So, someone posted a list of Outlast RP blogs for someone and

This is about the highest compliment a role-player can receive. So... thanks, buddy.

Touch Screen, Bitches~!

I have a new laptop. This new laptop has a touch screen. I am tickled what must be a very pretty shade of pink by this fact.

A lot of hassle went into getting this thing. There was yelling. Not from anyone I knew and not about computers but there was still yelling. Some... individual outside of Wal-Mart (which I don't honestly like at all but I needed a new computer) basically told my mum and I to "get out of my country if you don't care what happens to it" when we said we weren't registered voters. I thought about turning around and saying, "I'm Canadian" just to see what he'd do but I don't think that would have solved much. So that was a thing.

But anyway... I've been hanging around and watching the Seattle Mariners play so that's been helping. I'm slowly getting things set up and changed over (and I think Miles has a laptop like this, come to think of it. Anyway...)

I'll be fighting that little bit of learning curve that comes with changing word processors while attempting Camp Nanowrimo this month. Also, editing/ghost writing/I'm not exactly sure what I'm doing but I'm helping.

So yeah, that's really all the news right now: touch screen, people are weird, learning curves, Camp Nanowrimo.

Right now I'm going to go relax and probably take a shower and then try to write. We're having dinner with my grandparents tomorrow so I'm not sure how much I'll get done at their house.

Anyway, I hope you're all having a good day/night/week/whatever and I will see you all soon.